Reconcilable Differences: Rebuild Your Relationship by Rediscovering the Partner You Love--without Losing Yourself (Paperback)
Every couple has disagreements, but what happens when recurring conflicts start to pull your relationship apart? Do you lie awake hoping that your spouse will eventually see things your way, or rehashing the evidence that you're right? Demand some immediate changes--or else? This popular, science-based guide offers powerful solutions for couples frustrated by continual attempts to make each other change. True acceptance may seem difficult to accomplish, but the clear-cut steps and thought-provoking exercises in this book can make it a reality. You'll learn why you keep having the same fights again and again; how to keep small incompatibilities from causing big problems; what communication strategies really work to resolve conflicts; and how to problem-solve and make positive changes--together. Updated throughout with new research, practical tools, and examples, the second edition features a new chapter on mindfulness.
Mental health professionals: visit http://ibct.psych.ucla.edu to learn about using this self-help guide as an adjunct to therapy.
Brian D. Doss, PhD, is Associate Professor of Psychology at the University of Miami, where he teaches and conducts research on couple therapy and romantic relationships. Dr. Doss lives in Miami with his wife and two children.
Neil S. Jacobson, PhD, was Professor of Psychology at the University of Washington until his death in 1999. The author or editor of numerous publications, Dr. Jacobson was one of the world's most widely cited family therapists.
"No matter how many books you have read to improve your relationship, read this one, and follow the research-based principles it presents! The authors are internationally known scientists who have produced a book that all couples need to read. It's not the differences between you and your partner that matter, but how you handle them, and this book shows exactly how and why."--Howard J. Markman, PhD, coauthor of Fighting for Your Marriage
"There are lots of books for couples that make interesting reading, and some that provide specific, doable suggestions for improving your relationship, but just a handful--including this one--based on principles that have been scientifically shown to work. Any couple that wants to better understand and overcome problems in their relationship will find this book a great place to start."--W. Kim Halford, PhD, School of Psychology, University of Queensland, Australia
"One virtue of the book is its utter realism....Offers a slew of tools that couples can use to reconcile their differences without the help of a therapist." (on the first edition)
— The New York Times
"Packed with data, wisdom, and common sense." (on the first edition)
— Milwaukee Journal Sentinel
"Gives several guides to building acceptance."(on the first edition)
— USA Today
"An excellent book with much to offer about a well researched and well thought out application for couple therapy." (on the first edition)
— Journal of Couple and Relationship Therapy